little words

nothing to really talk about....unless you wanna hear about how my back is in excruciating pain. who wants to read about that?!! have yourself a great NEW YEARS!! bye bye

Motivate"oh alright!"

the holiday's are over and now its time to get back to the real world. i have tons of laundry, dusting, dishes and other cleaning to accomplish. i am tring to motivate myself, i haven't gotten to that point yet. the holiday was nice and i did enjoy the time with my family but it was exhausting. two days later and i still want to sleep and lay around. my room looks like a bomb went off i am not looking forward to getting to that task, neither is my man. laundry is horrible it never stops it grows like mold on old food. i would hire someone to do that chore for me if i was ever to become wealthy, i know my luck that day is never gonna come so i best get use to doing it myself. my mother and i are so different she gets a high off cleaning and loves laundry, she might bitch but i know she does enjoy it. if she was to come to my house right now she would have a bitch fest. she would tell me what a pig and that i live like trash. mind you no one gags when they enter my house its just not perfect i let things accumulate until i motivate once every couple of days. i am not liking this lazy bug i caught. well i guess its time to get a move on....that means one more cup of coffee and a smoke by that time i will have talked myself into getting off my rear end....literally talk myself into it!!! sad huh?

I hope so....

Did everyone have a great holiday? Well I sure hope so! 2009 here we come...

Not Much...Just a sweet wish to all

well so far today its just another monday, 3 more days to christmas!! sorry to say i cant wait for it to be over. i wish everyone a happy holiday season though! before we know it 2009 will be here.....wow time flies.

Sad Story...Think of Others

Christmas is just around the corner4 days to go, i feel like the Grinch this year. i didn't want to decorate or put up the tree, it just seems like alot of work for something that will be taken down in a couple of weeks. we did decorate actually my man did, at least someone here is in the spirit. the sad thing is that this year alot of friends felt the same way, no one is in the so called "holiday spirit". the economy is so bad right now that its put a damper on alot of families holiday. The news reported 2 days ago about a man that committed suicide, the news showed the house where it happened it's a big beautiful house where he lived with his girlfriend. sad story and only 1 week before Christmas. its been a proven fact that this time of year the suicide rates go up, so terrible to think a happy time of year is the when it goes up. i am sure that the suicide rates have gone way up this year due to the horrid economy, but the news hasn't reported that, huh! i think its because our new president is thought of by alot of Americans as a savior and will fix everything, no one person can fix our problems. i feel for any family that has delt with any tragedy during the holiday season and hope their cloud comes by to help them thru.

Watch Your Speed!!

when your driving in your car your suppose to watch the street signs, right! there are no "U" turn signs, no parking signs, yield, stop and the speed limit signs. i just celebrated a birthday, now i am 1 year older(yuck). i am sure everyone realizes that after a certain age the years fly by and before you know it a year passed and your older. its not really that big of a deal for me right now because there isn't a speed limit sign to remind me of my age yet. soon every time i drive by certain speed limit signs it will be like a bratty kid laughing at me ha ha your 35 ha ha! same when you turn 45, 55, 70... yeah i know they are important signs and are needed it is just one of those things i thought about driving on my birthday. i just wonder if anyone else has ever looked at it in the same way? my thought for today!

When To Decide On Going Back To Bed

well we are gonna be one friend short for Christmas....we will miss you Kevin....see you when you return from concrete and metal. i feel bad for kev, this day started out on a bad vibe for him. the first bad sign his day wasn't gonna be going well was some one or something wet in his shoes. the second was when he went to get on his bike some one(we know who) banged up his bike, for no reason too! the third he gets caught in the rain on his way to the store. i think thats when kev should have decided to return to his bed, but of course not he decides to ride his dilapidated bike a hour away. well kev's bad luck got alot worse when he took his long trip and now he is on a long vacation and we will miss him until his return. bye bye kev.

Part Of The Flock

Sunday i woke early and scrounged around the house for change, i needed a cup of coffee bad. i only needed a $1.00 and could only come up with .64 cents. i went to the doughnut shop at the corner in hopes someone i knew was there and i could come up with the rest of the money. when i arrived no one was there, i walked around looking for change on the ground just like a scavenger. i saw a man standing near by and asked for change and was denied any, samething when i asked another. wow, i just wanted a cup of coffee i wasn't looking for booze here it is 8:30 am, and i don't look like a panhandler. Denied .35 cents so i decided to try to get a cup with the change i had, they know me at the shop anyway i just rather pay for my things.
i got my coffee and was sitting outside the shop watching the crows walking around the tables looking for food. a crow lands on top of the table near by and starts picking at crumbs that were left. wow, that is when i realized 10 min ago i was just like that crow, but instead of crumbs i was looking for small change with no luck. the crow made out better and i am happy for him but, pretty sad for myself. ah, i got my coffee so i shouldn't complain.

Look at the Brighter side:

i was talking to a old friend the other day and i mention that my memory has gotten so bad. the conversation had a light tone, it wasn't anything major. i joked that by the time i was 40 i would be considered a Alzheimer's patient. i am a very forget full person and its getting worse over the years. whats worse is doctors do not seem to worried about it. i have other issues more the factor. well here again for the second time, on the same day is a quote from Friedrich "The advantage of a bad memory is that one enjoys several times the same good things for the first time. the quote made me smile and look at the problem in a lighter way. it still is a pain in the bump kiss not remembering the most usual things.

When You Lose Your Cool

i have been in a very good mood lately until....... someone who was being irresponsible and could have hurt an innocent person took her stupidity out on me. everyone knows that when you walk thru a parking lot look for cars, cars that are backing up, pulling in, what ever. just like crossing the street, look both ways before you cross the street, same in a parking lot. i pulled into a parking lot driving slow looking for a place to park when a lady pushing a wheelchair comes cruising out from between two parked cars, i stopped to avoid an accident. the woman pushing the chair starts shaking her head and bitching at me. i should of ignored the idiot but instead i had to say something, i didn't want to be blamed for her stupidity. i told the woman "hey you should look before running out between two parked cars" .well that set the woman off she started yelling at me and telling me i sped into the lot and should slow down....well lets see i am in a small lot looking for a place to park, yeah i was cruising at a whole 10 miles/hr. that speed would win me the Indy 500!!! well a yelling match broke out and i let the words fly from my mouth. i have this problem that when i get mad i let the bad language fly. the woman threatened to take my benefits from the food bank away from me because she worked there. she works there and was pushing a patron back to her car in the parking lot but the woman's safety was of no concern of the employee. i had the problem solved when i spoke to the person in charge and found out this woman has had prior complaints. yeah i bet she did. i am sorry for getting into it with the idiot. i guess my stress level made me snap and i did. i have been doing good lately too and let one stupid person get the best of me. i am happy to say it was just a stumble.

Our Chinese Water Dragon

we have a new family member, "Spiro" a Chinese water dragon. we wont know the sex until its about a year old. hope its a male with a name like Spiro!! very interesting reptile, they will change color after a year and depending on the sex will develop spikes on their neck. Spiro loves to take bathes(its a water dragon) go figure. the meals consist of crickets and fruit, Spiro prefers the crickets, but like mom always says " you have to eat your veggies" and will if crickets are not offered. maintaining Spiro's environment is pretty basic keep the cage humid use proper lighting for day time and proper light for night. we spray the cage to keep the mulch damp and make sure water is changed and Spiro is fed. i took Spiro with me to the store today, we have a leash for him/her. the weather has been cold lately and not liked by a cold blooded animal, so Spiro has been kept in the cage without exercise. today is beautiful we have warm air clear skies, i figured Spiro would enjoy the sunny day. i think it scared the hell outta Spiro, but the color of Spiro told me it did some good giving Spiro the sun and the humidity Florida has to offer. we will get Spiro use to outings as soon as summer gets here, that lizard will be in heaven due to the fact it likes humidity. we are in the process of getting a bigger cage and making it a show case in our living room. Spiro is gonna have a beautiful home with plenty of branches to climb and a waterfall for bathing. i want it to look like we are looking out a window into a rainforest. i cant wait til its finished and Spiro has a great home and we can watch as a life is lived.

Sense Bad Vibes?

What a weekend, usually no one is around, but not this weekend. We had tons of visitors, we don't mind the company it just wore us out. i am glad the house was clean, my parents even stopped by and my mom is obsessive compulsive.



what has me puzzled the most is my cat "baby" who is a very social animal who loves anyone. Kevin on the other hand has made an enemy. he cant walk by baby without the cat hissing and ready to pounce on him. when kev is around baby hides in my room, and its really bad if kev goes in my room baby will attack. this is not my normal social cat, has me puzzled. I keep asking kev what he has done to baby and he swears nothing. do animals know something us humans don't? kev must radiate a bad vibe only baby sees or feels. i wonder if i should go with my close pal and family member baby and exclude kev? Nah, i couldn't do that to kev he needs his sub family right now, poor guy is going through tough times and good friends are suppose to help out. i truly believe that. kev is a very loud and constant mover, he moves around constantly, fast and quick. could that be it he is to wild for the cat? who knows baby is fine right now and back to his old self, of course kev isn't around. baby at least gets a break from crazy kev.



here is baby he is so beautiful, see what kind of gem can be found at the humane society! There are tons of animals who need homes, why get a pure bread when a special animal waits for a loving family.

Yes its true

Yesterday i was writing about home(Florida). I talked about the highly endangered Florida panther and how Floridians need to help with their come back. I have a quote from Friedrich Nietzsche on my blog, today's quote says man is the cruelest animal. The coincidence that the day after my blog expressing my views on humans vs animals, Friedrich backs up my opinion years before mine was expressed. I enjoyed that quote and fully believe it. Bye for now.

Home sweet Home

Picture of my favorite place near my home
I am slick, i bought a 18 pack of beer for my man and Kevin and convinced them to clean the house. they accepted and got right to work. I now can relax on the patio and listen to music and have my coffee!

Thank you wine....for your comment, i wish i could see Australia with all the beautiful plants, and wildlife. Australia, i am sure makes Florida seem ordinary.

Never take home for granted, everyones home has that special something... people travel from all over the world to see Florida. I love Florida, it just took me 30 years to figure it out. I have tons of childhood memories, my favorite thing to do as a child was to play in the woods, climbing trees and building forts( i was a tomboy!!). I remember being 9 and bringing home a 1 foot alligator(at the time they were endangered) boy i got in major trouble. Alligators i am happy to say came back strong and i still enjoy watching them in the wild. I just wish the Florida Panther would make a strong come back....Florida is tring (there are an estimated 30 -40 left in the wild)! The residents of this state need to help, I remember seeing a panther in the wild they are majestic. I have seen plenty of them on the news..because people for some reason don't see a PANTHER crossing the street...with warning signs posted in the area(panther crossing !!) It brings tears to my eyes when you see this scared helpless animal laying in the road while rescue teams work to keep the panther alive. That is if it still is. Humans no matter where they are should take care of the wildlife and protect their environments. I hate seeing forests tore down to make room for a shopping center. The real owners of the property (the animals) are evicted without notice and sent scrambling for new shelter. Humans would fight and cry if that was to happen to them. Humans can be selfish.

The majestic Florida panther

Taking a hike

i went to my fav spot...the environmental park by my house. i went alone to get some pictures. i was hoping to spot a deer or bobcat, didn't see a thing. i walked the trails quietly and ready to snap that special shot. i decided to camp out in a oak that drapes over the creek where i have spotted wildlife in the past. the old oak skimmed the creek as i sat and waited quietly for that special picture. couple hours and many sounds of something walking around the park and nothing. i will try again another day. i love to wonder around that beautiful place, great weather with a combination of native plants and old oaks. I enjoy nature and all its wonders i like watching a wild animal in its environment, going about its daily routine. sure i can see those same animals at a zoo but seeing the animal when its in the wild you can really appreciate why they were placed on the earth. i believe all nature has a purpose and should be protected.

Is there a cloud coming?

I received my first comment!! thank you words, wine, coffee,and art! i wish i had the writing abilities that they have. keep on blogging. i took writing classes in college and look i write like a boring person who complains! my use of words has to become more detailed. i remember i wrote a report in college for my writing class about : war and music...i wrote about the impact Vietnam had on the music of that generation. i never got to see what my professor thought of the report but i received a A for the class. i still wish i could of gotten her insight on the report. I personally think my work was thought out and written very insightful. what did my professor think, my opinion and hers were never the same. I did come to the conclusion that many of the rock and rollers of that generation were impacted by the war. some of whom did fight in the war...while sitting quietly waiting in the brush they thought about the war around them and to keep sane wrote about the experience, in letters or a song(for those who loved music). you cant forget the musicians who wrote music reflecting the war by writing music about peace. Vietnam was a horrible war that shouldn't have taken place. i said it before horrible things happen to all of us but, then one day your floating on that cloud. Credence clearwater revival is my favorite band of that generation, John Fogerty the lead singer served 2 tours of Vietnam and his music reflects. John fogerty wrote alot of music during his time in the war. john fogerty is a great example of war impacting music. please don't get me wrong i am not a person who approves of war. my country is in war right now and i have 4 cousins serving our country. i am proud of each of them, i just don't want to lose any of them. war can change a family....is a cloud coming.

live and learn?

went to see a helpful friend yesterday,it was a meeting i was looking forward to. i needed to get a few things off my chest and my friend was there to listen. i am stressed no matter how i look at things either bills and money get me down or if i take a different route then my living situation stresses me out. my friend was right i have to find the happy medium, if one. my life might always be this way with new obstacles pushing me either to stumble or fall. i enjoyed my visit, i am glad to have someone who listens and can give me ways to change my train of thought. Life is either great or got ya down... where is the happy medium. i just want what anyone wants, to be able to take care of my bills and have no money worries. no stress on "oh damn" i am out of dish soap can i scrape up some change to get it. i wouldn't argue if i was to win big money but being able to take care of the house hold is all that matters to me the most over big money. i guess with the economy being so bad, asking for a comfortable life is asking alot. isn't it sad that we didn't learn from past mistakes to keep our economy from getting so bad. what happened to knowing the ole saying "learn from your mistakes!!"


i am up early today 4:30am my lover is to blame, who wakes up in the mood at 4:30. hey i love him, i could have tried to go back to sleep but 6:30 comes quick, i figured ah just make a pot of coffee and start my day early. i have a great man he is always there for me but his early morning romp sessions can be real early. men cant live with them or without. esp mine he... even though i wouldn't give him up for anyone, and if another teenie bopper comes along and tries to take this man from me i will flip my lid. the last man in my life, mind you it was a 10 year relationship, was ruined by a 18 yr old who knew he was taken. she still became involved with him and ruined our family. do people know what common courtesy is and what family is suppose to mean? hey the 18yr old can have the slime ball they deserve each other i found a real man. i just cant believe i didn't kick her rear in, if i stole a man that i knew was in a committed relationship i would expect my rear to be kicked. she got off lucky i hope she realizes it lol! she is so dumb she prob. doesn't lol!

i have a better life now so i am gonna stop dwelling on that past incident. believe it or not, my life is better now. i just want to be able to live without the stress of money. i already went there so i ain't gonna go there again. i just will wait to see what the future holds. life is.... mysterious, one day it goes horrible then the next week your on a cloud, and if it wasn't for the bad day the cloud would have passed you by. we just have to take things as they come. what i need is to stop and think before i act. i know that's a bad habit i have but just like any habit they are hard to break. i will over come and learn to think before i make major decisions. what i say and do is 2 different things. i gotta break the bad habit.
enough for now..i just wanted to get a few things off my chest. bye bye

Thank you mark!

See i am not bright! but honest i did call your comp yesturday!! love you

Cought getting it on!!

one day sitting and having my coffee I noticed two lizards having sex on the screen....I just had to take the dirty pic. I don't think this makes me a pervert right lol!!

I hope this pic makes you laugh like it did me, laughing relieves stress, i should know bye bye

Morning coffee

Here i am as i am every morning drinking my coffee and having my smoke. I like to watch the squirrels run around the big oak tree, they really tease my cat. Hey as long as its my cat being teased its funny! Baby my cat gets so excited over these squirrels that one day he ran into the screen SMACK! Funny, like when a person walks into a closed glass door. I have done it, not only does it stun you but it sure embarrasses you... esp if others are around to witness.

Florida is going through a cold snap, yes it does get chilly here, but its nice to sit on my porch with the cool air its so refreshing compared to the nasty heat and humidity we get in the summer. This is my favorite time of the year. I actually will put on makeup and dress nice for a change during the summer the hair goes up and makeup collects dust unless I want to sweat it off, and I don't want to waste expensive cherished makeup. I'm not one of those woman that are afraid to step outside without her face on. Most days I have my hair up no makeup, dark circles its pretty scary! Doesn't stop me from doing what I want and I realized one day I don't have to please anyone but myself. If my face scares you look away!! When I do get done up hair perfect and face in place its funny to see acquaintance's faces esp if its the first time they see me done up I call it the shock look because they stare and cant believe its me. I am not a supermodel don't get me wrong I am just a average woman but when a average woman goes from scary to hot without warning you get good raves!!

Gee! I smoke alot in the morning but a cig sure goes well with my coffee and I love coffee of all kinds....I wont go there it would take up alot of typing.
I have to cut back but I really don't see it happening you gotta really want to and I am not there yet. My boyfriend smokes too so we would have to do it together and at the moment we aren't doing anything together. My fault I was grumpy and took it out on him. He isn't completely off the hook though. I am up early on a sat while my love is on the couch still asleep, two nights now we haven't shared our bed and for two nights i didn't sleep well for instance me up early ever esp on a sat is not ordinary behavior for me. Stress is also playing a huge part of my behavior, I am trying to just stumble not fall. I fell hard about a year ago and it took me a year to stand back up, I don't have drug problems I am not an addict except of coffee and cigs, I suffer from chronic depression and my lover is my medication I needed. Who would have thought when one man trips you and watches you fall that another man will stand by and help you stand again knowing esp what ailments I deal with. Tim is perfect I love him.We usually are sitting outside with our coffee together talking and enjoying the crisp air and the nature that surrounds us. I am alone today writing instead.

See if I Stumble or Fall

I decided last night I needed a place to exercise some thoughts. I found this lucky place and fixed it up to make it mine. While i sit and wonder....about anything, to chomp at the bit, or what ever. I have my place and maybe others will be interested in my thoughts and tid-bits. Do you want to see if i Stumble or Fall?

Wow can i do it?

I am trying to get the hang of this blogger.... is if by chance anyone takes a look leave some pointers. I have to get moving for the day. I saw one blog i really enjoyed so far her pictures are interesting and i enjoyed looking at her views of simple things we usually take for granted.

My favorite quote for starters

"I have great faith in fools.....self confidence my friends call it!" thank you Edgar Allan Poe