i just cant take bullshit any more, getting taken advantage over and over again really hurts and gets old. i can never meet a real man, one that treats me great and wants to take great care of me. i want to meet someone with goals and even goes after his goals instead of just talking out their ass. i am a loser magnet, and now i have come to the conclusion i will remain single. single is the best for me, i have a man in my life my son and i believe he will always be there for his mother. i can trust him and he is a great boy, who worries about his mother more then a boy his age should. i feel bad he does, but i am lucky in a way too.
there is a man in my life right now who i talk to and we share a lust and nothing more i dont want a relationship and he has one. we enjoy each others company and have fun. its better we keep it on the down low better for me and for him, esp him. thank you! you know who you are and have helped me get through a terrible fall. i hope i can dig out of this hole, always fighting to just stumble but not this time i didnt stumble i fell into that hole i hate so much.
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Monday, November 16, 2009
LIES GET YOU NOWHERE
weird things been going on since i have been on last. alot of life changing things of sorts. i say lets start from the beginning, tim my boyfriend of about 2yrs, lied to me for 6 months about taking care of his ssdi paper work. i have been supporting tim for 2 yrs, thats rent, utilities, gas , cigarettes. he payed for food. i have a child to make sure i can support not a man so the supporting my boyfriend was growing old. tim i thought was taking care of his papers so he could help by paying his half of the bills like originally planned, but year and half later i'm still doing it. i even signed a new lease because he said his money was on its way!!!
tim didnt tell me about his lie i found out through my mother and someone involved with his paper work. tim told them i could get involved in his ssdi work, i had to hear about it through other people not the man i loved and said he loved me. we made a decision in the beginning of our relationship that we needed to be open and honest about everything. tim and i have had our hearts broken by cheaters and liars and wanted a good sound life together. yeah, i guess i was the only one who met it when the life promise was made. lieing to me about that was to me like he cheated, i left tim. this man who still begs me and wants me to still be his girlfriend doesnt realize i could have helped him in the beginning and we could have gotten his paper work all taken care of. i would have been there right for my man. then when he finds out his secret why couldnt he just sit with his girl and talk to me about the problem. together it could have been worked out some way some how. the lie ended it for me.
i have this growing surge in my body and i think its due to my being single again. i am upset things didnt work out with tim we were a great pair but lies, i hate them!!! i have a friend who has a energy about him he doesnt know how i feel about him. i wish he did, or would care but he wouldnt. time could only tell where i am headed and a relationship isnt what i am looking to get into right now anyway so my surge is gonna have to chill i guess
tim didnt tell me about his lie i found out through my mother and someone involved with his paper work. tim told them i could get involved in his ssdi work, i had to hear about it through other people not the man i loved and said he loved me. we made a decision in the beginning of our relationship that we needed to be open and honest about everything. tim and i have had our hearts broken by cheaters and liars and wanted a good sound life together. yeah, i guess i was the only one who met it when the life promise was made. lieing to me about that was to me like he cheated, i left tim. this man who still begs me and wants me to still be his girlfriend doesnt realize i could have helped him in the beginning and we could have gotten his paper work all taken care of. i would have been there right for my man. then when he finds out his secret why couldnt he just sit with his girl and talk to me about the problem. together it could have been worked out some way some how. the lie ended it for me.
i have this growing surge in my body and i think its due to my being single again. i am upset things didnt work out with tim we were a great pair but lies, i hate them!!! i have a friend who has a energy about him he doesnt know how i feel about him. i wish he did, or would care but he wouldnt. time could only tell where i am headed and a relationship isnt what i am looking to get into right now anyway so my surge is gonna have to chill i guess
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