To my readers thank you for your words of wisdom and for being able to handle my drab depressed words. I want so bad to be witty, happy, and loved. The young Milissa was all those she felt vibrant and ready to take on the world. She had many friends with invites to different parties, never feeling alone. These days its a whole different story, I was never invited to any of my high school friends weddings or baby showers. I guess they moved on and I wasn't part of the packing list. I truly believe that I am not someone anyone wants to deal with, my personality maybe, I am not well off (financial), no fancy car, or don't live in a beautiful home. I have nothing to offer but love.
I want girl friends ones i can go have coffee with or even a drink. We can chit chat over men, clothes whatever! I miss having close personal friends and I believe having that would help me. Hey, it doesn't always have to be about you milissa. Wait, is that my problem I make everything about me and it turns people away? Huh, if only someone who knew me would help me by telling me why I have these issues or what I do to chase everyone away.
The family still treats me the same, the odd ball loser! I don't think that's ever gonna change they will have their get togethers and oops forgot to tell ya Milissa we were having a cook out or what ever. I will go when invited because its my nature but I will tell ya what hurts the most is when you show up unannounced and there is a get together already in progress.
I have to go tears make it hard to write.....
